For one, I would not have been born with Asperger’s Syndrome. I wish I could change that about myself, and be a normie. Having Asperger’s Syndrome has caused many problems in my life. For one, I got kicked out of the NAVY, not once, but twice. For another, I ended up having to drop out of college on top of that. I expect I will never be able to get a government job now, because I might have issues with my clearance. But I will not give up. I also think that Asperger’s Syndrome prevented me from being able to get married- but I think thats because I was not yet diagnosed. Had I been diagnosed, it might have been a different story. Oh, well.
Second thing I would change, would be never getting kicked out of the NAVY. I never saw my discharge coming. Eventually, no matter how long you are in, you have to get out eventually. But being kicked out? What a nightmare. I fear it will never end. I never really did anything to be kicked out. When I had issues, I sought help. Now, I am sitting in Cheyenne, Wyoming because I am not sure what to do with myself. I am excited for my journey, it was fun driving here. I saw a lot of Colorado. I also am going to enjoy this summer weather in Cheyenne. I have the History channel on.
Thirdly, I never would have taken up smoking. Smoking is nasty, it smells. I feel like smoking helped to create an impression, with my supervisors in the NAVY. This impression lead to me eventually having to get out, before I could retire. I also feel that smoking pushed some girls away, that I was interested in. It probably prevented me from ever having a family. Over all, the impression people get when they see me smoke, seems negative. People who do not know I smoke, treat me differently. Its also been extremely difficult to quit. The longest time I was able to quit smoking was for four months in San Diego, California. Then, a day came where I wanted a cigarette, and could not figure out what to do next. I quit several times before and after that, with no success. Infact, my smoking increased in volume.
In conclusion, I wish I had never been born with Asperger’s. Asperger’s syndrome has ruined my life more than once. Yet, I did meet Scott. Scott is the turn around. I wish I had never gotten out of the NAVY. I also wish I had never taken up smoking. So far, my life is full of bad decisions. Well, Eve Online just finished updating. Time for a cigarette, and then to play some Eve. Have a good day! Thank you for reading my blog.
The Courier 